When we start talking about seeing life’s difficulties with a positive spin, I know from personal experience there can be a part of the self that wants to throw a hand up in the air and turn its back on the whole conversation.
Girl friend, these troubles are mine! I came to them the hard way…with bumps, bruises, and plenty of tears. And you just want me to push them aside? Sister, puh-leez!
It may sound like I am exaggerating, but I have heard it from friends and clients too. Something in us needs to hold onto the dramas and traumas of life, and when someone suggests we move away from them ….especially the big, hairy, scary ones….. we stand our ground.
I have shared over the last several months about working through my big stuck-in-place stories, dealing with the illness and death of loved ones, facing personal fears and those the same scary-world scenarios we all see on TV. The more I practice moving out of the pain and into the possibility, the easier it is getting. Here are some of my secrets.
Start where you are. If you feel yourself digging in with both heels, staying close to the pain….for whatever reason….let that be where you start your journey towards healing. Giving yourself permission to honor the hurt can often be an important step in eventually finding relief.
Invite your creativity in. Honoring the hurt with creativity helps you take something that feels stuck and brings movement to it without disregarding the part of you that needs the experience recognized. It also opens a door to a new perspective. The options are endless for how to bring creativity into a difficulty. They range from journaling to dance, include music, gardening, or just getting quiet and going inward.
A Favorite Technique. One of my faves right now is to imagine that some thing greater than myself…. that could be a Higher Power, helping spirit, imagined healing hand, angel, saint, or some part of myself more wise… that some Guide has a gift for me that comes from the situation I am stuck in. I get quiet, close my eyes, and let my helper hand me a box that will show what the gift is. I open it and look inside. Sometimes it takes me awhile, may even takes more than one visit to see and understand what is inside the box. I am patient. I try to never force it. Try to let it come more from my creativity and less from my willful mind. The gifts are often simple and nearly always, if I am willing to receive the gift, I find them comforting and healing.
An Organic, Intuitive Process. Moving from difficult and into delight is a process. The most helpful part in my opinion is the decision itself. Will I choose to be happy? How long will I stay with all the hard feelings the difficulty brings? Could I redefine myself as one of those people who bounces back…who feels the feelings, listens to that guiding spirit within myself that knows how to move towards happiness then resets the path to lead me there? I have decided to be that person.
The Ultimate Reward. I have been exploring this for about 8 months, this transforming of those dense feelings into life lessons and morsels of meaningfulness. The process leads to all kinds of rewards. I am learning so much about myself and the way life works. But the ultimate reward is a sense of strength I feel from making my back to peace when life brings situations that feel difficult. I am discovering that I am resilient and that sometimes what feel like a pickle of a situation was really something beautiful in disguise. This is the key for me to staying on top of emotional wellness.
Current Workshop: Angels In My Studio 2013
Before you leave: Check Out Angels In My Studio…the e-course