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Posts Tagged Women Who Run with the Wolves

Changing My Story

I grew up with stories. My dad could spin a yarn like nobody’s business. They were often just on the edge of believability in that place where you knew they probably weren’t true but you sure wanted them to be. His mother was a storyteller in her own right. She told me of the past. How she met my grandfather, how she built a house with her own two hands, about the child that died unexpectedly, and how my life changed my family. Because of them, I fell in love with stories.

Not long into my adulthood, I began reading a master storyteller, Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Her books and tapes were like sacred literature in my development as a woman. That might sound “far fetched” (as my dad likes to say) but it is the truth. Clarissa taught me to look at story as medicine, as a thing that tells us about ourselves, gives us guidance for healing. I learned along the way that I could use story to change my life.

Change your story; change your life.

I know it is true because I have put it to practice over and over again.  I was the kid that did poorly in school. While my cousins and best friends were hanging out on the Honor Roll, I was struggling through books and trying to wrap my head around equations.  I was in a fog. I struggled through the first years in college too but after learning that I could change my story, I started telling myself I was a good student. I daydreamed on what it would feel like to live that story, and my grades started to improve. I fell in love with learning and even went on to get my Masters in counseling. I walked away with a 4.0 and a national award for influencing the field of counseling. Sometimes, I am amazed at the distance I came.

That is just one example of how changing my story has drastically changed my life.

Today, I am sitting with a different story. This story has been spinning itself for twenty two years now. It is a story that tells me I will die young….in fact my story suggest I will die at the age of 45.  That is not very long from now.  I turn 45 in 30 months.  Exactly two and a half years from now.  Why would this story have so much weight?!

When my mom was a young woman, her father died. He was 45. And as children who have lost their parents often do, they begin to feel their parents’ deaths are a reflection of their own deaths, a kind of inheritance.  She began to believe she would die at 45. And in fact, she did.  Crazy, huh?  I tried not to fall into that rut myself, but some mechanism inside me switch on when she died. It chatters out that story, and my life, my actions follows suit.

No, there are no blatantly obvious signs of my early demise. I have no disease, no life threatening disorder. But sometimes, I feel myself moving so fast and frantic that it seems as if I am running from something. This week I realized I am.  Death is nipping at my heels. So I live life at a sprint’s pace…quickly working to make my big, beautiful dreams come true before the end of it all.

 

Well, today I stopped.

Today I stopped, and I turned around. I stood quietly and looked Death in the face.

This is the beginning of Changing My Story.  I don’t know where it will lead me exactly, but I do know that with my own hand on the pen I will choose life. Life….happy, peaceful….and long.

What story have you changed in your life? What story would you change if you knew you could?

 

Creativity Tribe Bare Bones

My mind envisions its big dreams with full curves and in living colors.  But in real life, dreams don’t often happen that way. They take shape one bone at a time with bits and parts being brought together in illogical, chaotic bunches.  Sometimes the content in front of us looks like a mess, but the soulful Creative holds fast to the inner vision and carefully manages its assemblage.

This website has had that kind of blind focus to it. I have sat in front of it for weeks pulling this element up to link with that element, wrestled wryly aspects of my dream into the confines of the web world to see what shape it will take. This morning as I look at what I have before me, what is ready to be shared with the world, I do so with a reminder to my eager dream-mind that this bare boned structure is the foundation of the creatura that Creativity Tribe will evolve into.

The lesson of the bare bones is such a valuable one for me. It is actually one of the first wisdoms I took in as a young Creative. I learned it from Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Este’s book Women Who Run With the Wolves.  She told the story of La Loba, the Wolf Woman, who collected the bones of dead animals, which Clarissa suggested were discarded dreams with the potential to be resurrected. La Loba, the ultimate Wild Woman, stored the bones in a cave and when she was ready, she pulled out the bones of the animal she wanted to work with. She would place one bone next to the another until the entire sculpture was in place. Then, she would sit in front of the shape and dream about the song she wanted to sing.

When she was ready, she would open her mouth and sing out her song. As she sang, the bones would begin to flesh out. Sinew, muscle, skin, fur, tooth, and nail. Cell by cell, the wild animal formed. And when the last strand of hair and the last tooth were in place, La Loba would sing even deeper, from the depths of her soul. As she sang, the creatura would begin to move with an inhalation and exhalation, with life. Still, La Loba would sing deeper. And the animal would spring into action, running right out of the cave, into the darkness. Somehow as she ran, it is said that it might have been the way the moonlight shone on her fur, or the way the starlight sparkled in her eye, something changed her. And the animal transformed into a woman, a woman laughing wildly as she ran towards the dark night.

I am La Loba today. Before me sits the beautiful white sculpture that is the foundation of my dream come true. Each bone is a dream I have tended to in the seclusion of my soul, saving them for just the right moment to share with the world. This moment.  This is my wild animal, my own wildness ready to spring to life. I offer her to you, to witness, to join. As I sit in front of her, I listen for the song I will sing and without a doubt know that my song will be an amalgam of many diverse voices from around the world….perhaps to include yours.

I hope you will be listening for your part of the song, that you will sing deep, from the depths of your soul, so that together we can give our wild, Creative Spirits reason to laugh as they run into the beautiful mystery that is life itself.

Welcome to Creativity Tribe, welcome to a sanctuary for your Creative Spirit, and to an evolving opportunity for creativity, community, and celebration.  I invite you consider this your home, a place where you come to be inspired, where you offer your creativity as inspiration for others, a place for gathering those discarded dreams you wish to claim once more, a place for transformation.

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Welcome to CT

Welcome to CT

Hi, I am Rachél.... the quirky, big-hearted soul behind Creativity Tribe, a sanctuary for your creative spirit. As a life coach and artist, I know the importance of community, celebration, and transformation. Creativity Tribe is abuzz with connections to other creative bloggers and offers tips and stories to inspire your creative lifestyle!
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There is a beauty that comes out of sharing a journey with another person....a dream for yourself, a direction for a project, a way out of the muck that holds your Creative Spirit back. Let's talk about working together. creativitytribe@gmail.com